Day thirty-one was November 1st, which is the anniversary of my brother, Derrick’s death. He died in the wee hours of Halloween night 2008 in a head-on car accident. November 1st, 2008 was the worst day of my and my families lives. He was only 21 and at the time had an 11 month old son. My world had been turned upside down and yet I felt that I needed to be strong for my parents and younger brother who were having a very difficult time. Day thirty-one started out fine. The morning wasn’t too bad. Then I saw a post on Facebook from a friend who lost her son, November 1st would have been his 10th birthday. The wave of sorrow crashed over me with full force. When it was time for my daughter to take a nap I sat in the chair rocking her to sleep with tears streaming down my face. I couldn’t stop and even now I am tearing up. After I got her down I took some photos. I was trying to capture my tears, but they had dried up enough that I couldn’t get a decent photo. Later on I opened it in Photoshop and started editing. I went with black and white, then posterized it. I cropped it down and it was still missing something. So I made a new square canvas and created this double mirrored look. I was so pleased with it I used other photos from that day to create two more. I am very happy with these. I like the simplicity, contrast and abstraction. Plus they were great therapy and I am all about art being therapy. I don’t know where my life would be without it.

“Said Lord, please give me what I need, He said there’s pain and misery.” ~ Mark Lanegan, Screaming Trees

 “I count the million miles I’m driftin’
From here, to hell
Today” ~Mark Lanegan

“Bleeding soul becomes a bitter mind.” ~Pepper Keenan, Corrosion of Conformity